The Pipsqueak Posts, Episode 30: the one with the Pi-raaaah-tes of Paw-zance

(With apologies to Gilbert & Sullivan) (and you can sing it if you want! – thank you to Liz Ringrose for the ‘matters doggymatical’ and Paw-zance)

On learning that they’d been hooligans while I went out to get a wiper-blade for the car (play-fighting, bouncing about and general chaos), I asked them what they’d done and they simply burst into song…


We are the very model of a well-behavèd spaniel,
We’ve information biscuity and Bonios and vegetable,
We know the rules of dinner, and we quote the gastronomical
From roast chicken to barbecue, in order categorical;
We’re very well acquainted, too, with matters doggymatical,
We understand equations where the answer is bone-atical,
About the parks and beaches near we’re teeming with a lot o’ news,
With many cheerful facts about the bins for stinky doggy poos;
We’re very good at sitting and at waiting when we’re told to stop;
We know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters biscuity and Bonios and vegetable,
We are the very model of a well-behavèd spaniel!