Dexter: Arch, Arch – why are the parents putting chicken wire everywhere?
Archie: Why do you think? It’s not as if they’re fans of industrial chic.
Dexter: Yeah, you said Mum likes Pre-Raphaelite stuff. Edward Burne-Bones and DG Bones-etti. That’s prettier than chicken wire, though she’s put it on the wall so I can’t chew it. (Sighs heavily.) I was having such a great game hiding from you. I was going to leap out and say ‘raaaah!’.
Archie: Oh, Pipsqueak. That’s why. They thought you were too big to squeeze behind the piano; when you suddenly disappeared behind it, that made Mum panic. I know you came out backwards, but they’re worried you’re going to get stuck. They also think you’re going to trash the wires behind the TV, the way you trashed the patio vegetable garden — which is why that is all behind chicken wire now, too.
Dexter: Chicken wire spoils all the fun…
Archie: Pipsqueak, just run round the recycling bin, jump out and yap ‘Surprise!’ at Mum. That’s what I used to do when I was your age. She thought it was cute and gave me extra fuss and treats.
Dexter (learning furiously) : Yum. Treats.