Dexter: Arch, it’s the hottest day of my life! And it’s horrible.
Archie: Never mind, Pipsqueak. Thankfully we don’t get too many days like this. The best thing to do is lie by Mum (so you get cool air from the tower fan – I’m going to sit on the sofa so I get air from the other fan). And Mum will put a wet tea towel on us to help cool us down.
Dexter: I normally chew tea towels, but I don’t have the energy to chew *anything* today. Or to bark at the fan. I’m just TOO HOT.
Archie: I know, Pipsqueak. Me, too. Just drink lots of cold water and have lots of naps. Once the back garden’s got some shade in it, Mum will fill your paddling pool and you can splash about…