Archie: Pipsqueak! Pipsqueak! I know Chloe’s in the front garden but you can’t climb out of the win— phew. So glad Mum just heard me barking and grabbed you before you fell.
Dexter, rather sulkily from the floor: But I wanted to go out and play.
Archie: Through the front door with your lead on, only.
Dexter: Huh. You spoil *all* my fun. My life is RUINED.
Archie, realising pup is about to have a teenage strop and planning distraction: There’s a song about dogs and windows. We can go and pose for it in the conservatory and sing, if you like.
Dexter: Sing? All right, then.
Archie: How much is that doggie in the window — the one with the waggly tail? How much is that doggie in the window? I do hope that doggie’s for sale.
Dexter, flouncing: So you want to get rid of me now, do you?
Archie: Arggh! No. I would like you to stop pulling my tail when you want to play, but I’m used to you being around. It’s just a song. All right. We’ll sing a different song about windows. It’s one Mum loves by Travis. Flowers in the Window.
Dexter, still flouncing: I don’t want flowers. I want a biscuit.
Archie: I can’t open the treat tin. You’ll have to go and find Dad. He’s a pushover…